Again, a long lapse of time since my last post...
And (again) this doesn't mean i'm 'off the wagon'. To be honest i'm not on the wagon either! haha.
Weighed myself this morning out of curiousity, for the first time in probably 6 months. 65 kilograms, which is slightly less than last time (66.5 or whatever) - but it means i've successfully maintained this weight loss for 2 years now, without much difficulty at all (i would say no difficulty, because i haven't been trying at all - could it be I'm USED to my lifestyle that this lifestyle just feels like me?) I confess the last few weeks (ok maybe months) I've been eating more takeout than usual... and yet, i've kept the weight off...
Could it be? Could i have reached my ultimate dream: where 3 years ago I used to stare with jealousy at the skinny people in McDonalds wolfing down the burger 'n fries, and wondering what was wrong with me that I couldn't do that without being massive... Am i now the skinny person in McDonalds...? Yes! I actually think so! And how did I do it? I stopped focusing on food and dieting, which means that i only ever eat when I'm hungry. To be honest, 'dieting' is the worst thing for your mind - i used to spend all day thinking about losing weight. But what did that mean? That i spend all day thinking about food! Of course I'm going to want to eat all the time!
Anyway, better get on with my lit review, ugh.
xox Nikki
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
I'm still alive!
Haha,
Just realised it's almost been a year since my last post... I'm still alive, and (as it has in the past) this gap hasn't meant that I've fallen off the wagon. Still the same weight, amazingly...! By the amount of effort it's taken to stay here you'd like i weighed 400 million kilograms...
Things have been a bit tough this year - my course slowly drove me insane as i gave up more and more of my outside life to make time for it... until i had nothing, and was actually living at the hospital (yes, literally)... and understandably every part of me started to scream "got to get out!" I took 6 months off, and have just enrolled for my last two years in semester 1 next year. I'm going to be moving back to the same hospital accommodation, but have given myself a few rules:
1) Spend my free time either studying or talking or eating in the common room (NOT hidden in my bedroom), and don't ever say no to going out with friends (unless i have a really legit reason)
2) don't give up soccer next year, even though it will mean a heck of travelling in the week to normanhurst...
3) go home on weekends...
4) keep working 1 1/2 days a week - say no to uni if you have to... because that time is "Me" time!
sigh i hope my plan works... because i really just want to hurry up and graduate and get out of being a student...!
XOX Nikki
Just realised it's almost been a year since my last post... I'm still alive, and (as it has in the past) this gap hasn't meant that I've fallen off the wagon. Still the same weight, amazingly...! By the amount of effort it's taken to stay here you'd like i weighed 400 million kilograms...
Things have been a bit tough this year - my course slowly drove me insane as i gave up more and more of my outside life to make time for it... until i had nothing, and was actually living at the hospital (yes, literally)... and understandably every part of me started to scream "got to get out!" I took 6 months off, and have just enrolled for my last two years in semester 1 next year. I'm going to be moving back to the same hospital accommodation, but have given myself a few rules:
1) Spend my free time either studying or talking or eating in the common room (NOT hidden in my bedroom), and don't ever say no to going out with friends (unless i have a really legit reason)
2) don't give up soccer next year, even though it will mean a heck of travelling in the week to normanhurst...
3) go home on weekends...
4) keep working 1 1/2 days a week - say no to uni if you have to... because that time is "Me" time!
sigh i hope my plan works... because i really just want to hurry up and graduate and get out of being a student...!
XOX Nikki
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Soccer season starting soon!
Ok, soccer season is starting in about 8.5 weeks... it's time for the C25K program again...
i actually want to finish it this time, so maybe I'll run a bit slower...!
xox
i actually want to finish it this time, so maybe I'll run a bit slower...!
xox
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Remerging (again)!
Hey all,
Yeah i disappeared again for a while. But you know what the fantastic thing about disappearing these days, is that it doesn't mean a relapse for me anymore...! I'm still within my healthy weight range... Maybe some day i'll want to be a bit slimmer, but I'm ok where I am for now! And the best bit is - that it hasn't been hard! Because of the changes I made when losing weight (i was going to say: "it was a lifestyle change" - but how many of us who say we are undertaking a "lifestyle change" can honestly live with that?), I've been able to eat what i want when i want, and not even think about my weight at all to maintain it. Does anyone else think that's great? It's like my body has found the new me, and liked it so much it automatically wants to stay there!
So how long has it been now since i went on a plight to a thinner me, forever, and sustainably?
Well it's been a whole year. For the first time in my life, I've maintained a thinner weight for a year, with no pain, no difficulty no nothing. In the past: I'd lose the weight in 2-3 months through ridiculous eating-restriction and exercise regimens, and then within a month or so would go back to the weight i was before, usually more.
Well anyway, i'm going to get out of my pajamas and stop being a lazy bugger!
Love Nikki
Yeah i disappeared again for a while. But you know what the fantastic thing about disappearing these days, is that it doesn't mean a relapse for me anymore...! I'm still within my healthy weight range... Maybe some day i'll want to be a bit slimmer, but I'm ok where I am for now! And the best bit is - that it hasn't been hard! Because of the changes I made when losing weight (i was going to say: "it was a lifestyle change" - but how many of us who say we are undertaking a "lifestyle change" can honestly live with that?), I've been able to eat what i want when i want, and not even think about my weight at all to maintain it. Does anyone else think that's great? It's like my body has found the new me, and liked it so much it automatically wants to stay there!
So how long has it been now since i went on a plight to a thinner me, forever, and sustainably?
Well it's been a whole year. For the first time in my life, I've maintained a thinner weight for a year, with no pain, no difficulty no nothing. In the past: I'd lose the weight in 2-3 months through ridiculous eating-restriction and exercise regimens, and then within a month or so would go back to the weight i was before, usually more.
Well anyway, i'm going to get out of my pajamas and stop being a lazy bugger!
Love Nikki
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
(There) and back again!
Hi guys,
Sorry I've been a bit AWOL for a while - life fell on top of me a bit, I lost my beloved Mieke (Irish Setter) of 14 years (a huge ray of sunshine in my life!) and then my grandma a few weeks later. Then uni got more hectic. And i wallowed in despair again.
the good news is, that it allowed me to take a break again from 'weight loss'. My weight went up about 2 kilograms, but I'm exactly the same size as before so I can happily and truthfully attribute that to gaining back my normal fluid again. And all this I've done by eating whatever I want, when i want - with (in ALL honesty!) not a single restriction!!! So my metabolism seems to be working quite happily again :). When I feel ready, over the next few months I hope to tackle those last few stubborn 5 kilograms and get to that nice, healthy 60kg that i've been dreaming of since I was last 60 kilograms! But gone are the days of stopping a diet and watching your weight escalate to more than before. Can you believe it??? I surely can't! It's far too good to be true!
With all thats gone on over the last few months, and my depression and social isolation slowly getting worse - I regret to say that I started being more and more absent from uni and my concentration was out the window... and so I had to take the rest of this term off uni. I'm going to be doing this term again next year in summer semester, and using the rest of this term to try a new anti-depressant medication, and eventually get some CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy - psychotherapy training me to prevent depression relapse, and positive thinking. It sounds very waffly, but there is good evidence to suggest it can be extremely effective!) to help me out of this - so I can start being (once again) the motivated, enthusiastic med-student that I know is hidden in me somewhere!
Tips that helped me keep the weight off while taking 'weight loss holidays':
- don't think too hard about food or what you are eating or worry too much. If you eat too much, don't punish yourself - allow your body to subconsciously sort it out...!
- still try to get some exercise. Most days I've been trying to get between 8000-10000 steps a day on my pedometer, i just mindlessly put it on in the morning and mindlessly take it off at night as a part of my normal routine. Some days i get only 5000 (bad me!) but others i get 15000 so it works out to have a good average.
- keep up the water intake!
- even if you are bingeing on chips and chocolate, still try to fit in your 5 serves of veg and 2 serves of fruit. Try to get 3 serves of calcium (dairy), and try to keep up your omega-3's (linseeds, salmon/tuna). But whatever you eat outside of that, is up to you! By getting those nutrients in, you're helping your body realise it isn't starving, and help regulate your metabolism (and energy and hunger levels) to burn off extra calories that you may (or may not) be eating!
- a couple of times, yes, i ate well past overfull - but i didn't stress about it, and let my body sort it out by just trying to get on with life (tried to forget about it) and eating when i was hungry later on. But just try not to make yourself really overfull for a few days in a row, if you can, as this will play havoc with your response to insulin and leptin (hormones that give you energy and help burn fat)
Anyway, I Better go clean my very messy room.
Nikki
Sorry I've been a bit AWOL for a while - life fell on top of me a bit, I lost my beloved Mieke (Irish Setter) of 14 years (a huge ray of sunshine in my life!) and then my grandma a few weeks later. Then uni got more hectic. And i wallowed in despair again.
the good news is, that it allowed me to take a break again from 'weight loss'. My weight went up about 2 kilograms, but I'm exactly the same size as before so I can happily and truthfully attribute that to gaining back my normal fluid again. And all this I've done by eating whatever I want, when i want - with (in ALL honesty!) not a single restriction!!! So my metabolism seems to be working quite happily again :). When I feel ready, over the next few months I hope to tackle those last few stubborn 5 kilograms and get to that nice, healthy 60kg that i've been dreaming of since I was last 60 kilograms! But gone are the days of stopping a diet and watching your weight escalate to more than before. Can you believe it??? I surely can't! It's far too good to be true!
With all thats gone on over the last few months, and my depression and social isolation slowly getting worse - I regret to say that I started being more and more absent from uni and my concentration was out the window... and so I had to take the rest of this term off uni. I'm going to be doing this term again next year in summer semester, and using the rest of this term to try a new anti-depressant medication, and eventually get some CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy - psychotherapy training me to prevent depression relapse, and positive thinking. It sounds very waffly, but there is good evidence to suggest it can be extremely effective!) to help me out of this - so I can start being (once again) the motivated, enthusiastic med-student that I know is hidden in me somewhere!
Tips that helped me keep the weight off while taking 'weight loss holidays':
- don't think too hard about food or what you are eating or worry too much. If you eat too much, don't punish yourself - allow your body to subconsciously sort it out...!
- still try to get some exercise. Most days I've been trying to get between 8000-10000 steps a day on my pedometer, i just mindlessly put it on in the morning and mindlessly take it off at night as a part of my normal routine. Some days i get only 5000 (bad me!) but others i get 15000 so it works out to have a good average.
- keep up the water intake!
- even if you are bingeing on chips and chocolate, still try to fit in your 5 serves of veg and 2 serves of fruit. Try to get 3 serves of calcium (dairy), and try to keep up your omega-3's (linseeds, salmon/tuna). But whatever you eat outside of that, is up to you! By getting those nutrients in, you're helping your body realise it isn't starving, and help regulate your metabolism (and energy and hunger levels) to burn off extra calories that you may (or may not) be eating!
- a couple of times, yes, i ate well past overfull - but i didn't stress about it, and let my body sort it out by just trying to get on with life (tried to forget about it) and eating when i was hungry later on. But just try not to make yourself really overfull for a few days in a row, if you can, as this will play havoc with your response to insulin and leptin (hormones that give you energy and help burn fat)
Anyway, I Better go clean my very messy room.
Nikki
Monday, September 1, 2008
Trigger Factors and the Binge 'Prodrome'
Well I remember before how weight-loss programs used to talk about noting your trigger factors, or things that you associate with eating. One very important thing that I've made sure I do this time is work out what are the trigger factors or danger zones that are going to make me prone to overindulging...!
As I've already mentioned, the biggest one is not having eaten enough recently (i.e. when yu are losing weight!) - and that will always be the biggest challenge that you have to face! And there unfortunately isn't much you can do about that one, other than eat a bit more of nourishing foods (without going overboard!). But how you stop yourself from going overboard depends on how you manage the other factors that trigger overindulgence.
A couple that I've previously noted are stress (uni, or even doing too much exercise and not compensating with food!), PMS, and alcohol - those are three big ones for me, that I've had to work to get under control. The stress and PMS i get through by recognising when I am going through them, so that I can counteract it. I will always eat a bit more before TTOM, but there's a difference between a BIT more and a LOT more! Most of the time, the best way to get on top of stress is a nice walk in the fresh air outside - and then I get back and try to deal with the stress (e.g. if its uni, i'll do that assignment!). Alcohol: i set myself a limit of no more than 3 SDs in one night. And i've actually stuck to that pretty well...!
But recently I've just discovered a new trigger factor. Yes, i didn't have a very good day last week :(. But I didn't go back into my old cycles of excessive restriction the next day to force myself to counterract the 'damage', i just kept going on as usual and naturally ate when i was hungry, stopped when i was full. But this trigger factor was LACK OF SLEEP. I had about 1-2 hours of sleep the night before, and i wasn't feeling very well at all. I had a late breakfast, and then came home and passed out on the sofa for a few hours... before i knew it it was 5pm, i was still tired and i was RAVENOUS! Absolutely uncontrolleable hunger! And it hit me when I woke up - i sort of went, "Oh damn, i've gone past the 'safe' zone for eating... I'm now in danger...!" So i whipped up a large tuna salad in the hope that that might do something. But no, it was too late - my body wanted calories, and it wanted them FAST so all it wanted was sweet/fatty/processed foods... sigh, at least they were homemade anzac biscuits (meaning i know they were made with 100% butter as opposed to some funny animal/vegetable fat...!), and I still went for nuts/cheese (though too much of!) in the hope that it might nourish me...! And then, haha, i went straight back to sleep for another 15 hours!!!
So I'm going to watch out for that sleep demon... :P I mean i expected that sleep was very important (lack of sleep --> production of 'cortisol' stress hormone --> hunger, lethargy, etc), but i didn't realise how much of a nasty trigger factor it could be!
So I guess: I can't stress how important it is to KNOW your trigger factors. and to KNOW your binge prodrome: i.e. the set of 'symptoms' you go through just BEFORE you go into a binge period. Knowing the prodrome is the most important tool you can have, as it will help you halt binges before you get to the danger zone (once in danger zone, there is no going back!). If you need to, keep a diary and note your moods/feelings/cravings/relationship-with-food each day - so that when the binges happen you can see the same feelings happening in the few hours before.
:) Nikki
As I've already mentioned, the biggest one is not having eaten enough recently (i.e. when yu are losing weight!) - and that will always be the biggest challenge that you have to face! And there unfortunately isn't much you can do about that one, other than eat a bit more of nourishing foods (without going overboard!). But how you stop yourself from going overboard depends on how you manage the other factors that trigger overindulgence.
A couple that I've previously noted are stress (uni, or even doing too much exercise and not compensating with food!), PMS, and alcohol - those are three big ones for me, that I've had to work to get under control. The stress and PMS i get through by recognising when I am going through them, so that I can counteract it. I will always eat a bit more before TTOM, but there's a difference between a BIT more and a LOT more! Most of the time, the best way to get on top of stress is a nice walk in the fresh air outside - and then I get back and try to deal with the stress (e.g. if its uni, i'll do that assignment!). Alcohol: i set myself a limit of no more than 3 SDs in one night. And i've actually stuck to that pretty well...!
But recently I've just discovered a new trigger factor. Yes, i didn't have a very good day last week :(. But I didn't go back into my old cycles of excessive restriction the next day to force myself to counterract the 'damage', i just kept going on as usual and naturally ate when i was hungry, stopped when i was full. But this trigger factor was LACK OF SLEEP. I had about 1-2 hours of sleep the night before, and i wasn't feeling very well at all. I had a late breakfast, and then came home and passed out on the sofa for a few hours... before i knew it it was 5pm, i was still tired and i was RAVENOUS! Absolutely uncontrolleable hunger! And it hit me when I woke up - i sort of went, "Oh damn, i've gone past the 'safe' zone for eating... I'm now in danger...!" So i whipped up a large tuna salad in the hope that that might do something. But no, it was too late - my body wanted calories, and it wanted them FAST so all it wanted was sweet/fatty/processed foods... sigh, at least they were homemade anzac biscuits (meaning i know they were made with 100% butter as opposed to some funny animal/vegetable fat...!), and I still went for nuts/cheese (though too much of!) in the hope that it might nourish me...! And then, haha, i went straight back to sleep for another 15 hours!!!
So I'm going to watch out for that sleep demon... :P I mean i expected that sleep was very important (lack of sleep --> production of 'cortisol' stress hormone --> hunger, lethargy, etc), but i didn't realise how much of a nasty trigger factor it could be!
So I guess: I can't stress how important it is to KNOW your trigger factors. and to KNOW your binge prodrome: i.e. the set of 'symptoms' you go through just BEFORE you go into a binge period. Knowing the prodrome is the most important tool you can have, as it will help you halt binges before you get to the danger zone (once in danger zone, there is no going back!). If you need to, keep a diary and note your moods/feelings/cravings/relationship-with-food each day - so that when the binges happen you can see the same feelings happening in the few hours before.
:) Nikki
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Now and then...
So I'm going to go back about 5 years and delve into my diet history...
... to help decipher: why has my weight loss been so much easier and more sustainable this time?
While it may because I've learnt so much about how the body regulates fat storage/release and metabolism, learning this has only provided me with the fuel to actually put this information into action...
Fortunately, to aid me in my 'history-delving", i actually have a diary of what i ate when i LAST lost weight, and last got to 65kg (that's right, i am slimmer now than last time!). Here are the things I noticed:
1) EXERCISE
2007: I used to run 45minutes, every morning at 5am, before breakfast. I'd do a 5 minute walk warm up, then jog for 20 minutes, walk uphill for 10 minutes, then sprint the last 5, and walk warm down for 5. On weekends I would have to counteract my binges (which appeared after about 4 months of dieting), by doing 4-5 hour slogs of walking. And I did pilates once or twice a week. And i was tired...
2008: I sleep-in until 6am. I walk everywhere I can: to the train, around uni, up stairs, so that most weekdays I clock up about 10,000 steps of incidental walking (8km). I do pilates (40mins) once a week when i have the energy, and on weekends I go for a walk outside - 1 hour up/down hills, with the occasional jog.
2) FOODS
2007: On 'diet' days - despite always getting the 2 serves fruit & >5 serves veg, my diet consisted of quite a few overly processed foods: I replaced normal cheese with kraft 'Free' singles and low fat cottage cheese. I ate a lot of tuna (never salmon) and tofu, and avoided meats where I could (especially lamb and pork). I ate artificially sweetened yoghurt (Nestle 'No fat') as opposed to reduced-fat plain yoghurt. I avoided nuts, seeds, and oils like the plague (using cooking spray or no oil at all). I used to eat seeded/wholewheat crackers, but instead went for the thinner/lighter Cruskits. I drank a lot of Diet coke (2 x bottles /day), and was always chewing sugarfree gum, mints, and lollies. I tried to eat the bare minimum of carbohydrates like bread, pasta, cereal and rice. I even limited lentils and pulses, afraid that they were too high in carbohydrates. I drunk skim milk instead of low fat milk. I used to bake 'low kilojoule treats' - brownies that replaced the sugar with splenda and the fat with blended prunes, 'almond biscuits' that replaced the almonds with almond flavouring and only used egg whites instead of whole eggs. I ate low joule jelly, 'diet' chocolate mousses/desserts, and drunk sugar-free cordial. I snacked on whole packets of 'fat free' rice crackers, and ate 99% fat free maggi noodles.
This produced a diet very low in fat (~15g/day), low in carbohydrates (~150g/day), and quite high in protein (~100g/day) - and probably at <1000calories/day.
(At binge times: I ate everything in sight, and consumed about 300g fat, 500g carbohydrates. This gave me a daily caloric intake of >4000 calories/day. If you look at my caloric intake over a week, it will be: 500, 700, 800, 4000, 200, 700, 4000, etc etc...!!! - from one extreme to the other - although still the same amount of calories on average as in 2008 (now).
2008: I always get the 2 serves fruit, & >5 serves of vegetables per day. I limit my processed foods to a minimum, except having some sort of 'nut bar' once a day (Sesame snaps, Be Natural bars, Go Natural bars, lately: Artisse Organic Flax seed bars) or a handful of almonds (when I'm home). I eat salmon AND tuna. I cook with generous (though still sensible!) amounts of olive, sunflower and sesame oils. I still don't use margarine or butter on my bread. I eat reduced-fat cheddar cheese, and creamed cottage cheese. If I occasionally eat crackers, they are always wholewheat (and not 'light' or reduced fat - just ordinary seeded crackers!). I eat whole eggs 3-4 times a week. I eat my meats with freedom, (though still don't like greasy cuts of pork or lamb - but I never have!). I drink reduced-fat milk and low-fat (unsweetened, or Attiki's low-sugar yoghurt), and always make sure i get 3-4 serves of dairy in me a day. Now I avoid all artificial sweeteners like the plague (including soft drinks, lollies, jellies etc etc) - if it is artifically sweetened, I will not eat it! I also avoid MSG (to a lesser extent than sweeteners, but I try not to eat much of them!). I eat generous serves of pasta, rice and bread at mealtimes - especially when I am craving them, and don't try to shut my carb-cravings up with sugar-free treats or vegetables. If I eat a 'treat' or 'sometimes'-food - it is always the Real McCoy, I don't see the point in going for a dodgy/diet version of what I'm really craving.
(This produces a diet with moderate amounts of fat ~40-50g/day, ~200g carbs and ~75g protein. My daily caloric intake is ~1500kcal.)
(I don't binge anymore, although my caloric intake does still go in (less-extreme) cycles from day to day: for a few days in a row it will be low at about 1200, then I'll be more hungry and consume 1,500-1,700/day).
3) MEALS
2007: On average, my meals were eaten in the caloric ratio of:
1 Breakfast: 2 Lunch: 3 Afternoon tea: 3 Dinner: 1 Dessert
(Despite knowing the benefit of a healthy-sized breakfast, this was a habit I could NOT break and would NOT break - for fear that I would end up ravenous in the afternoon and have consumed all my daily allowance, and thus go over, and 'blow my diet'!)
I used to push my meals back as long as I could, to see if i could last as long as possible without food. I never ate lunch (or snacked after breakfast) before 12am, and dinner was usually at 8/9pm at night. I ate dessert about 1/2 hour before sleeping.
2008: On average, my meals are eaten in the caloric ratio of:
1 Breakfast: 2 Lunch: 1 Dinner
(Lunch is usually me grazing over a period of ~4 hours between 11am and 3pm!)
I eat when I'm hungry, even if that means breakfast is at 10am. I try to cook dinner at about 6-7pm, never later. I save dessert from the night before for breakfast the next (usually fruit salad and yoghurt), and go to sleep at least 2 hours after last eating.
4) SOCIAL SITUATIONS
2007: I was afraid of going out, because I knew that there would be unhealthy food there. I was worried that people would judge me for not eating the food they were passing around. I used to eat very little for the day before and the morning of to 'save calories' for that evening (and exercised a great deal), "just in case" - and 'filled up' on water/vegetables/sugar-free foods before hand. I was worried I would crack under pressure and eat everything in sight (which i did!). I was worried that I would drink too much, then crack under pressure and continue drinking more and eat everything in sight (which i did!).
2008: I will admit, I'm still moderately afraid of going out - that I will crack under pressure, and that people will judge me for not eating the food. But now I eat more of the food, so the judgement is less of a problem. I have definately got my drinking under control (never more than 2-3 standard drinks in a night), by realising that if i drink wine/champagne it hits me earlier than if i drink spirits (which take a long time to hit me - several hours! - and are often accompanied by sugary drinks!). Suits me fine cos I don't really like spirits anyway, and I love my wine! I eat normally the day before, and the morning before going out (if anything, I eat more!). If I do eat a little bit too much, then the day after is when I automatically eat less and exercise more - because I'm just not hungry, and my body is fuelled for exercise!
-----------
5) THE RESULT?
2007: 4 months of that, and the cravings (-->binges!) got worse and more and more frequent, and I got more and more tired and lethargic and depressed (the vigorous, painful exercise stopped!) - and the weight piled on in a matter of weeks.
2008: Still going strong: my energy is high, and my cravings are low. And the binges... well, non-existant! If i decide to 'stop' my diet - I'll still be doing my 10,000 steps a day, incidentally. I'm already eating what I want, so how can I 'stop' that?
:) Nikki
... to help decipher: why has my weight loss been so much easier and more sustainable this time?
While it may because I've learnt so much about how the body regulates fat storage/release and metabolism, learning this has only provided me with the fuel to actually put this information into action...
Fortunately, to aid me in my 'history-delving", i actually have a diary of what i ate when i LAST lost weight, and last got to 65kg (that's right, i am slimmer now than last time!). Here are the things I noticed:
1) EXERCISE
2007: I used to run 45minutes, every morning at 5am, before breakfast. I'd do a 5 minute walk warm up, then jog for 20 minutes, walk uphill for 10 minutes, then sprint the last 5, and walk warm down for 5. On weekends I would have to counteract my binges (which appeared after about 4 months of dieting), by doing 4-5 hour slogs of walking. And I did pilates once or twice a week. And i was tired...
2008: I sleep-in until 6am. I walk everywhere I can: to the train, around uni, up stairs, so that most weekdays I clock up about 10,000 steps of incidental walking (8km). I do pilates (40mins) once a week when i have the energy, and on weekends I go for a walk outside - 1 hour up/down hills, with the occasional jog.
2) FOODS
2007: On 'diet' days - despite always getting the 2 serves fruit & >5 serves veg, my diet consisted of quite a few overly processed foods: I replaced normal cheese with kraft 'Free' singles and low fat cottage cheese. I ate a lot of tuna (never salmon) and tofu, and avoided meats where I could (especially lamb and pork). I ate artificially sweetened yoghurt (Nestle 'No fat') as opposed to reduced-fat plain yoghurt. I avoided nuts, seeds, and oils like the plague (using cooking spray or no oil at all). I used to eat seeded/wholewheat crackers, but instead went for the thinner/lighter Cruskits. I drank a lot of Diet coke (2 x bottles /day), and was always chewing sugarfree gum, mints, and lollies. I tried to eat the bare minimum of carbohydrates like bread, pasta, cereal and rice. I even limited lentils and pulses, afraid that they were too high in carbohydrates. I drunk skim milk instead of low fat milk. I used to bake 'low kilojoule treats' - brownies that replaced the sugar with splenda and the fat with blended prunes, 'almond biscuits' that replaced the almonds with almond flavouring and only used egg whites instead of whole eggs. I ate low joule jelly, 'diet' chocolate mousses/desserts, and drunk sugar-free cordial. I snacked on whole packets of 'fat free' rice crackers, and ate 99% fat free maggi noodles.
This produced a diet very low in fat (~15g/day), low in carbohydrates (~150g/day), and quite high in protein (~100g/day) - and probably at <1000calories/day.
(At binge times: I ate everything in sight, and consumed about 300g fat, 500g carbohydrates. This gave me a daily caloric intake of >4000 calories/day. If you look at my caloric intake over a week, it will be: 500, 700, 800, 4000, 200, 700, 4000, etc etc...!!! - from one extreme to the other - although still the same amount of calories on average as in 2008 (now).
2008: I always get the 2 serves fruit, & >5 serves of vegetables per day. I limit my processed foods to a minimum, except having some sort of 'nut bar' once a day (Sesame snaps, Be Natural bars, Go Natural bars, lately: Artisse Organic Flax seed bars) or a handful of almonds (when I'm home). I eat salmon AND tuna. I cook with generous (though still sensible!) amounts of olive, sunflower and sesame oils. I still don't use margarine or butter on my bread. I eat reduced-fat cheddar cheese, and creamed cottage cheese. If I occasionally eat crackers, they are always wholewheat (and not 'light' or reduced fat - just ordinary seeded crackers!). I eat whole eggs 3-4 times a week. I eat my meats with freedom, (though still don't like greasy cuts of pork or lamb - but I never have!). I drink reduced-fat milk and low-fat (unsweetened, or Attiki's low-sugar yoghurt), and always make sure i get 3-4 serves of dairy in me a day. Now I avoid all artificial sweeteners like the plague (including soft drinks, lollies, jellies etc etc) - if it is artifically sweetened, I will not eat it! I also avoid MSG (to a lesser extent than sweeteners, but I try not to eat much of them!). I eat generous serves of pasta, rice and bread at mealtimes - especially when I am craving them, and don't try to shut my carb-cravings up with sugar-free treats or vegetables. If I eat a 'treat' or 'sometimes'-food - it is always the Real McCoy, I don't see the point in going for a dodgy/diet version of what I'm really craving.
(This produces a diet with moderate amounts of fat ~40-50g/day, ~200g carbs and ~75g protein. My daily caloric intake is ~1500kcal.)
(I don't binge anymore, although my caloric intake does still go in (less-extreme) cycles from day to day: for a few days in a row it will be low at about 1200, then I'll be more hungry and consume 1,500-1,700/day).
3) MEALS
2007: On average, my meals were eaten in the caloric ratio of:
1 Breakfast: 2 Lunch: 3 Afternoon tea: 3 Dinner: 1 Dessert
(Despite knowing the benefit of a healthy-sized breakfast, this was a habit I could NOT break and would NOT break - for fear that I would end up ravenous in the afternoon and have consumed all my daily allowance, and thus go over, and 'blow my diet'!)
I used to push my meals back as long as I could, to see if i could last as long as possible without food. I never ate lunch (or snacked after breakfast) before 12am, and dinner was usually at 8/9pm at night. I ate dessert about 1/2 hour before sleeping.
2008: On average, my meals are eaten in the caloric ratio of:
1 Breakfast: 2 Lunch: 1 Dinner
(Lunch is usually me grazing over a period of ~4 hours between 11am and 3pm!)
I eat when I'm hungry, even if that means breakfast is at 10am. I try to cook dinner at about 6-7pm, never later. I save dessert from the night before for breakfast the next (usually fruit salad and yoghurt), and go to sleep at least 2 hours after last eating.
4) SOCIAL SITUATIONS
2007: I was afraid of going out, because I knew that there would be unhealthy food there. I was worried that people would judge me for not eating the food they were passing around. I used to eat very little for the day before and the morning of to 'save calories' for that evening (and exercised a great deal), "just in case" - and 'filled up' on water/vegetables/sugar-free foods before hand. I was worried I would crack under pressure and eat everything in sight (which i did!). I was worried that I would drink too much, then crack under pressure and continue drinking more and eat everything in sight (which i did!).
2008: I will admit, I'm still moderately afraid of going out - that I will crack under pressure, and that people will judge me for not eating the food. But now I eat more of the food, so the judgement is less of a problem. I have definately got my drinking under control (never more than 2-3 standard drinks in a night), by realising that if i drink wine/champagne it hits me earlier than if i drink spirits (which take a long time to hit me - several hours! - and are often accompanied by sugary drinks!). Suits me fine cos I don't really like spirits anyway, and I love my wine! I eat normally the day before, and the morning before going out (if anything, I eat more!). If I do eat a little bit too much, then the day after is when I automatically eat less and exercise more - because I'm just not hungry, and my body is fuelled for exercise!
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5) THE RESULT?
2007: 4 months of that, and the cravings (-->binges!) got worse and more and more frequent, and I got more and more tired and lethargic and depressed (the vigorous, painful exercise stopped!) - and the weight piled on in a matter of weeks.
2008: Still going strong: my energy is high, and my cravings are low. And the binges... well, non-existant! If i decide to 'stop' my diet - I'll still be doing my 10,000 steps a day, incidentally. I'm already eating what I want, so how can I 'stop' that?
:) Nikki
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